Ask the Sergeant:

If people were allowed one cop question--one absolutely no-holds-barred, you’ll get an honest answer and you won’t get into trouble question, I bet for most people it would be: What can I say to get out of a ticket? So, next time I get pulled over, what should I say?

Jim Larnoch, Hollywood

I have been a Police Officer for 15 years and a motor cop for the last ten. I have heard many things over the years and I really get a kick out of hearing what people have to say. I wish there was a magic statement that I could pass on that would guarantee you a trouble-free journey, but each officer has his or her own personal threshold for what they consider a good reason for whatever it was you did that you got stopped for. Often times the totality of the circumstances can play in your favor or work against you, and you need to make sure that whatever you say fits with whatever you did.
If a patrol officer stops you, you could most likely smile, say you are sorry, and get out of it with a warning versus if you are stopped by a traffic officer (highway patrol or city cop with wings on his shoulders) or a motor cop. You better be upside down and on fire with a note from your mom to even get more than a cursory dose of sympathy from them!
What I thought I would do, though, is take a little liberty with your question and give you some idea of what people have said when they were stopped and how it worked for them. You can be the judge and maybe make some decisions about what you might want to say.
Take the guy driving a new red Nissan 350Z at 65 in a 45 mph zone. I get him stopped and ask why he was going so fast. He replied that he had no reason for the speed but wanted to assure me that he was “bringing the speed down.” My next thought was that, if he was doing 65 and decelerating, what speed was he doing in the 50 zone just before he reached my location? Result: ticket!
We have a location in our city that has five signs warning approaching traffic that you can’t make a right turn on a red light. One of these signs is four feet tall and three feet wide, mounted ten feet in the air on a light pole, and a second is on the center divider directly in front of the turn lane and angled to face traffic as it is sitting, waiting to turn, not 35 feet straight ahead. I have had numerous drivers make the right turn and, to a tee, they nearly all claim that they never saw “the sign,” as if there was only one. A few even add that they have been making the turn for years and were never stopped before. That lead's me think that if you miss five signs, especially year after year when driving through that intersection, then maybe you could use a refresher in traffic school. Result: Lots of tickets!
A guy riding a new black Harley Dyna with the headlamp bypassed (the wire pulled in the ignition switch so that the headlamp is off), wearing a pudding bowl novelty helmet and a t-shirt, with his fourth re-issued Learners Permit, gets stopped because he went out and had ‘fish-tail’ pipes put on and is rattling windows four blocks away. He tells me that “loud pipes save lives” and that his buddies have regaled him with story upon story of how their pipes have kept them from being hit by cage drivers not paying attention. My thoughts on his statement are that, if this rider were truly interested in safety, maybe he would wear a real helmet, have on something more than a cotton t-shirt from the last bike shop he went to, would have obtained his motorcycle endorsement after four years of trying, and would leave his headlamp turned on so other drivers can see him approaching on his black bike. Result: Ticket for multiple violations!
Driver: “Good morning; coming over for dinner to-night?” My response: “Hi Mom; you bet, what are you making?” Result: No ticket. She’s a great cook and it doesn’t matter what she did, she is still my mom!
A 16-year-old girl who has had her driver’s license for three months makes an illegal left turn out of the High School parking lot. She has three passengers in the car, all 14 to 16 years old, in violation of her driving restrictions as an underage driver. She is crying at the window when I walk up and ask her why she made the turn. With misty eyes she tells me that this is the first time she has driven to school and that she has to get her friend to where she works, but first they were going to Jamba Juice down the street so they could get a drink. My thinking is that she knows she can’t have passengers and is already allowing herself to be talked into doing things she knows she can’t do. Not a good start. Result: Ticket!
A 35-year-old Dad with two screaming twins about 14 months old in car seats in the back of a Gold Sienna minivan. He is doing 75 on the freeway at 11.30 at night. When I stop him to ask why he was going so fast, the twins are crying, he looks like death warmed over with bags under his eyes, and he is nearly in tears. He tells me that all he wants to do is get the kids to sleep so he can sleep a few hours before going to work in the morning and that driving often put the kids to sleep. I remember my kids and how tough some of them were. Result: No Ticket. Guess I’m a sucker for parents and crying kids, and, truth be told, I was happy to get away from the car as quick as I could!
A 23-year-old female college student and fitness model is stopped for speeding after making me chase her down halfway across the city. When she finally notices me, she ducks down a driveway behind a hedge near a deserted baseball field. As I am walking up on the car, she throws open the driver’s door, puts both feet flat on the ground and, by the time I have made it to the door, has her blouse hiked up to “here,” her skirt lifted up to “there,” and is asking, “Is there anything I can say or do to get out of this ticket?” Result: A great big ticket and a second unit to make sure everything is witnessed so she can’t complain later.
As you can see, not much you can say will get you out of a ticket. The best advice I can give is to just be honest and polite. Maybe that is just what it takes to get you on your way.
Ride safe, keep smiling, and take care of yourselves and each other out there.

For more on this story, pick up a current issue of FREE 2 WHEEL at your local dealer, or use the handy order form page found on our web site.

Scuttle Putt:

Here are a few facts that will make you feel even better about being a motorcyclist than you already do. They come from a survey conducted recently by Nationwide Insurance, which surveyed more than 2,500 motorcyclists, power boaters, bass boaters, and RV and travel trailer owners to take the pulse of America’s powersports enthusiasts.
The survey found that motorcyclists are the enthusiasts most motivated by adventure and fun (72 percent of motor-cyclists agreed that buying their bike was an adventurous thing to do, compared to 57 percent of bass boaters and 66 percent of RV owners. And 59 percent of motorcyclists said that, without their motorcycle, life would not be nearly as much fun. Only 36 percent of power boaters and 42 percent of RV owners said the same.
In addition to enjoying their sport, motorcyclists also take it seriously. Of the powersports enthusiast groups surveyed, motorcyclists are among the safest and most highly trained. Seventy nine percent of motorcyclists have participated in a safety program and 51 percent have participated in the past 36 months.

More scuttle >>

Way 2 Go:

SUDDENLY SCORE
Story by Brian Mussetter
Photos by Trackside photos &
Courtesy Brian Mussetter

It was November 16. The call came from the main street of Ensenada, in Baja California.
Ring. Ring.
Michelle: Hello?
Brian: Hi, Baby.
Michelle: What’s up?
Brian: Well, I’m on the starting line and I’m racing the first leg...
Michelle: You’re what?

Let me back up a bit. As some of you may or may not know, I worked on the documentary film Dust 2 Glory, about the Baja 1000 off-road race, back in 2003. Since then I’ve been back to Baja several times, once to document a friend’s ride on vintage Harleys from Malibu to Cabo, and last Summer to help my friends race the Baja 500. As the unofficial Team Coordinator, I helped organize and pre run. We got fourth place in the 40+ Pro Class despite some electrical gremlins and a head-on with a spectator’s truck that was going the wrong way on the course. I’ve also spent the last 10 years racing AMA events in the So. Cal. desert, earning my Intermediate license in the Vet Heavyweight and Vintage (Pre-1975) classes.
So when my friend Daryl Hambleton asked me to help his team (Pflueger Honda out of Hawaii) coordinate a run at the SCORE Baja 1000, I jumped at the chance. Our sponsor, Alan Pflueger, was paying our entry fee (about $2,000) and charges for Honda pit service (about $1,500) and was buying our race bike (a Honda XR650R for about $6,000, plus a purpose-built 685 cc race motor built by C. H. Wheat for about $2,500, suspension by Precision Concepts for about $1,500, and the rest of the goodies to make the bike Baja durable to the tune of around $10,000). And that’s not counting six other pre-run bikes at about $10 grand each. Suffice it to say, we were not messing around.

For more on this story, pick up a current issue of FREE 2 WHEEL at your local dealer, or use the handy order form page found on our web site.

BONSAI'D BIKE
Story and photos by Reid Libby

There are few who would argue that the original Triumph Bonneville is one of motorcycling's ultimate icons. Timeless styling, flowing lines, and fleet and nimble road manners made it a favorite in the ’60s and its impact is still being felt with the current range of like-named and themed twins.
There are those of us, however, who find that marching lockstep with fellow enthusiasts becomes a bit stifling and have to look further afield for satisfaction. Creative minds start bandying about terms like chopped, bagged, bobbed, or café’d and, before you know it, out comes the hacksaw and file and another golden oldie bites the dust.
Fortunately, Earl Kane, possessor of a very creative mind and a real talent when it comes to convincing metal to work on his terms, is not the kind of guy who would take a hatchet to a classic machine just for the sake of creativity. Purists can rest assured that no Bonnevilles were harmed in the creation of this bobber.

For more on this story, pick up a current issue of FREE 2 WHEEL at your local dealer, or use the handy order form page found on our web site.